The Ingenuous Queen

As I was peeing in the restroom of my workplace, during a usual boring shift, I heard a voice from behind, “Haven’t you been writing lately?”. To my surprise it was the Project Manager of the team I was working for, in his Lyric Sopranoish voice, with an elating smile, moving towards the next vacant slot to mine, to fulfill the purpose he was there for. For a moment it distracted my process but instantly I was amazed to understand that he was actually referring to the link of my Blog I have shared with him that morning – and WTF! The project manager had literally read it. I asked “How did you like it?”, again to my surprise he quoted a line from one of my Blogs, to which I was taken aback and thanked him (Of course we didn’t shake hands). Then after analyzing the fact that he loved my writing I acknowledged his question by telling him that, “I can only write, when I come across something terrifically striking”.

Now the purpose of sharing that instance with you is to let you know how good I am as a writer. Just kiddin’! Actually NOT. But after the shift ended, I felt it was a beautiful evening of December -for no reason- in 2016 and realized about what I told him in the noon about my writing, while having my beer..  ‘Terrifically striking’. Indeed, I was being pompous then, eventually realizing that it’s the Truth. Now in order to contribute towards the marvelous dynasty of my gratitude for the divinity called ‘Beautiful Female’, I wish she consider this as my ode to Her – for being the Ingenuous Queen of my journey.

Queen! That is what I have been calling her within my surreptitious conglomerate. The inception of that affectionate term happened when she appeared at workplace, in a strong black colored hooded sweatshirt, written on it in a shimmering golden colored letters, QUEEN! That’s it, I said to myself, ‘she is the most incredibly beautiful girl I have ever seen in that building’. I always used to watch her at cafeteria, downstairs at the lobby, in the workroom by placing someone exactly in a position so I can have a seamless view through their shoulder and trust me it’s an enticing experience. Her Balayage short hair style was the first thing which caught my attention, it’s a superfluous enhancement to her extremely pretty looking face. When she smiles, it’s as eternally cute as of a lil’ baby’s smile, which makes her appearance very obsequious and this trait does generate a feeling of resentfulness among the other females, though she shouldn’t care - like she does! At times I feel I can listen to her speaking, for a whole day, such an appeasing voice she has. At regular intervals I wait for her to say few words, coz’ the way she pronounces them is way too cutesier, often I imitate that but to an extent that can be excused. It never made any difference to me if she is surrounded by anyone, coz’ for me they doesn’t exist when I’m watching her. I could never describe her eyes, since I never dared to look at them straightly. Now that makes her distinguishingly special for me. Since I learned there is a fundamental difference between beauty and sexuality. Beauty pleases your senses whereas sexuality controls your senses or even more correctly your senses go berserk. Now she created this strongly fundamental difference between her and the other females at the workplace for me. Where the ‘self-proclaimed’ beautiful girls embellish themselves to come to office everyday so as to cause a force in fellow dumb male colleagues to approach them, The Queen simply appears. Coz’ her exquisite simplicity defines her beyond beauty and sexuality.

I can write a book about her, but for now, by God’s grace if she happens to spare her valuable time and most valued interest to read this, I’ll shout out loud, It is Accomplished!

Recently I came to know by her colleague that she had an accident and shown me her picture in a terrible state, which I couldn’t bear, in fact it trigged a solid effect in me so much that I wished that the one who hit her by his car should die a gruesome death or I shall get a chance to stab him to death for hundreds of times. But the magical aspect of the picture was she yet had that terrific quintessential smile, which could put a stone to melt. I hardly ask God for anything, but I pray to him that he put you on a pause button and make you live young and beautiful forever with that smile and hair.

Wish you a Speedy Recovery. Be Well!

Rendezvous with Lust

‘Abbey Chutiye!..

..it does happens that way, a man and a woman sleeps together in the night on the same bed and a child is born!.. Simple!’

That was the most deeply stupid and immature line, about anything connected to SEX, I heard out of an utmost idiotic ‘Suhaag Raat-Scene-Impact’ discussion, from a dumb 90s Hindi movie, back in school. I guess I was in sixth grade. But one can’t blame those stupid classmates of mine, for that thought process, bad English, and above all Stupidity - that’s the result of going to a bad School!

But since, I mentioned about the Hindi movies of 90s, YES.. I was terribly stimulated by the songs and the Heroines in those movies. Like, Madhuri  in ‘Dhak Dhak’, Sridevi in ‘Kaate nahi kat te’, Rekha in ‘Karo pyar mujhe’, Mamta Kulkarni and Urmila in ‘almost’ every song.. And above all, was swept away by the iconic scene where Jack makes a sketch of Roja and scene after that, before everything shatters, hitting the ice-berg. 

I clearly remember how almost every boy, back then requested for the video song ‘Turn the page’ by Metallica on the ‘Dial a song’ channel by the local cable operator (for unknown reason the name of the song appeared on the list as ‘Sixteen Years’). That was for the obvious reasons – Ginger Lynn and the Scenes! Though most of ‘em still wouldn’t know or ever cared to know her name.

 FYI: Ginger Lynn is the premier adult-entertainment star of the 80s – one of the greatest porn stars of all time... 

And Metallica is an American heavy metal band – this information is specifically for the boys from my school (this is the only time I’m using My School just to cut the crap).

Despite this mental masturbation, constantly there was an intense force, driving the urge of fulfilling an emotion. Eventually identifying that emotion and its nuances. Though it wasn’t so quick, it took years to analyze and respond to it in the right possible way – but that’s the dichotomy of its beauty, I love. Let me take you to the insights of it.

I confess and I swear, that I never developed lust towards any of the girls from the school I went, in those 10years. Not that they weren’t attractive or beautiful but primarily most of them were UGLY (I blame it on the color of the uniform) and the rest belonged to the NERD community i.e.: Toppers/Rankers.  The truth is I was always smitten by elder women. I couldn’t help that then or now or forever, and I love that. There were girls, senior to me in school but my sub conscious mind and instincts longed for someone more elder than them. After all these elements clashed resulting into an inscrutable battle, it led my fascination develop towards my Class Teacher!

Oopps... no this one... 

Someone like her... 

It absolutely comes from my utmost assertiveness, which was the beginning of the wait for an exquisite rendezvous with Lust! Now if you are turning into being assumptive about me or anything written, stop reading & kindly FUCK OFF!

I was in 2^nd grade, sitting in this classroom along with Neelam on this bench. The vacation was over and the new semester just started few days ago. The classroom was awfully painted. The brightness of the tube lights all over the ceiling, was way too bright for my eyes, in contrast to the dark atmosphere outside due to the heavy clouds. It was drizzling, and I was expecting, indeed, wishing for a flood. And then the bell rang for the next period.. Here she enters! Initially I didn’t look at her, since, I was trying to hit on ‘not-so-ugly’ Neelam NOTE: I wasn’t & never been & will be a Tharkee (Lascivious, Pervert or Lewd), but being a born admirer of beauty with such a kind heart and enormous talents, unlike many in the classroom – I was Smart!

  Eventually she announced that she will be our English Teacher throughout the year 

– that means I will get to witness this mayhem at the start of the day at school, before the ugliest faces I have to struggle with throughout those 5hrs. She was a Bengali, I could relate that with the big round Bindi on her forehead, perfectly placed in the middle, slightly above those terrific eye brows resembling a beautiful sunrise from the waves of an ocean – just like in the scenic paintings. Those submissive eyes laced with kohl, a pure malice. The golden brown shade of her pale skin, like it was exposed to the sun in that monsoon was an extension to the chaos. That snub nose with a black colored nose pin was simply an embellishment. I strongly believe GOD must have invested his most aesthetic skills to create that slightest cleft lip, which created an enormously devouring effect when she spoke, now just imagine what it could had been when she smiled.. Splendido.., It was evident that she knew the key to dress her body, to enhance and add  volume to her upper body while emphasizing the waist, also adding to the ongoing trip by the visible navel and de-emphasizing her lower body  in that azure color saree, creating a balanced, hourglass appearance. An elegant neck, structured shoulders, proportionately slim arms, nicely defined waist, gradually sloping out to the hips... An eternally perfect Pear shaped female body, I witnessed... Aah I need a drink now!

What I felt constantly after that... The kind of urge that was developed... About ‘Not so ugly’ Neelam.. And everything related and relevant to the inscrutable struggle of my wait for the eternal, rendezvous with lust, since that day... will share about it some other day.. 

Ooh.. my Class teacher...

She was not from this planet, for me.